Don't Call it a Comeback

After nearly two months of NO writing, I thought it was about time I pick this old habit back up.

Since it's great when I need to clear my head, and I just love writing.

Incase you don't happen to have a calender handy, I'd like to inform everyone that this is the last week of school.

Actually, I'm going to say it might be.

For Battle Ground's seniors tomorrow is the last day.

But for seniors like my sister, her last day of class is Thursday because of Clark.

And then it's final week. But no matter what day is your last day, I hope every senior has a great one, and remembers every moment in high school and enjoys having the World at your feet.

Because you all have earned it.

GO CLASS OF 2009!

(Although we all know 2010 is really the class you'd like to be in.)

I suppose I could call this phase in my life a transition phase.

Literally and metaphorically. 

As far as the literal sense goes, I am actually transitioning to a new home in 19 days.

I have a tendancy to be over-sentimental, but this time I have good reason.

Until this current house I've never lived anywhere longer than 2 years, and I'm going on 8 years.

But change is good, no matter how much I'm going to miss this place.

I still have yet to get my first kiss on the porch, though...

And for the metaphorical part, well a lot of things are and have been changing.

This year I've narrowed down my circle of friends a lot.

Some by choice, others just fell out.

But I have the best friends anyone could ever ask for right now, and I can trust every single one of them.

Sara, Brooke, Janelle, Ben, Sam Blake, and Izzie

If any of you guys are reading this, I look foward to seeing you guys every single day, and I love you all

Speaking of the big "L"...

I am ready for it.

Contrary to popular belief, I do actually want to date.

I know being single for my entire life may have you thinking that I have put dating on the "not-to do" list, but that my friend is where you are wrong.

Guys have always made me nervous, especially the ones I like.

And I've been talking to all my best friends about nerves, and I am trying to get over my fear of rejection, because I know life is too short to worry if someone likes you, when there is a whole world out there of other people. Wow that sentence had a lot of commas.

Although it might take some time, I am ready to stop being such a pansy.

Today was not such a good example of my new found confidence, but I'll let it slide. Just this once.

So from now on, I am going to stop worrying so much, and just think with my heart.

Love-1, Nerves-0.

SUCK IT SHYNESS.

Turns out I'm not in the mood to write anymore.

But I'm sure this urge will come back soon enough.

Oh, and Hawaii is next week. :) 

My Youtube Addiction Shared

Lately I have been watching youtube videos to no end.

It really is becoming a problem.

I would, however, like to share the videos I can't quit watching.

Enjoy

It's About Time.

I haven't written a long blog in too long.

So, it may be almost 2 am, but a blog is what I shall write.

The new (and last) quarter has begun at Clark.

And I like 2 out of my 3 classes. 

But I'm dropping the one I don't like, which is my art class.

It's a long story that goes into that one, so feel free to inquire if you want the full version.

Lately I have being doing this weird new habit.

I've been mentally making mix cds for people I think about.

But I don't actually give them the cd, or even make one.

It's just when someone gets into my thoughts (quite often it's a boy) I start making 

a list in my head of all the songs I would like to put on a cd and hand to them someday.

Maybe someday I will.

I want to know when mix tapes, or in our generation cds, went out of style.

I think nothing is more personal or romantic then making a mix of songs you love

or that remind you of someone and handing it over. 

It's like a yearbook you can play over and over for that time in your life.

So let it be said that I, Kymi Heney, think mix cds are the most romantic personal gifts you can give a person.

Now I just have to find a guy who likes making mix cds. 

Speaking of the male gender, I have also realized that I fall for a certain type of guy everytime.

I really like unique guys. That seems pretty broad, so I'll try and narrow it down.

I don't really know how to put into words a description of the kind of guys I fall for, but I can certainly make a list of things that I would really like in a boyfriend.

-Someone who appreciates music just as much as I do. Like, really, truly enjoys listening to it.

-Akward. I just love akward people as a general rule. And in a boy I find it so hard to not love it.

-A guy who has dreams. There is nothing more attractive then someone who knows what they want in life, or has no idea but is going to enjoy looking for it. And I'm not talking a 10 year plan with goals and Ivy League schools, but that stomach-churning feeling you get when you get one step closer to doing what you love for the rest of your life.

-I like older guys. Always have. But, it's not a must. Just a plus. Hey, that almost rhymed.

-Someone who wants to get out of Battle Ground. I sound so teenage angst on this one, and I do love the Northwest, but I have got to move to a big city. In the near future.

-A guy who loves the little things. Things like the way someone's smile looks perfect sometimes, or how looking up to the stars on a clear night can take your breath away.

-Speaking of stars...laying out under the stars is a big plus.

-And finally, a guy who simply loves love. I've never been in love, but when I am I'm sure I'll wear my heart on my sleeve. And when I do, I'd like a little love back.

Please excuse me if the above paragraph seemed like a personal ad, that was not the intent.

Just writing out what I've been thinking lately about the fellahs.

New music is finding it's way to my ipod lately. And I love it.

I want to make mix cds just to get it out in the World and share it with people.

There I go again with mixes...

But I really do.

So, please request a cd so I won't seem desperate shoving a cd with my favorite songs at you.

Who knows, if you are reading this maybe I have already planned a mental mix out for you.

You'll never know unless you ask.

I watched Jim Gaffigan's stand up for the first time about a week ago, and I have to say I love him.

I feel like everyone caught on to thinking he was hilarious and making hot pocket jokes that went right over my head, but now I can't stop quoting him.

Which I'm sure is getting old for my sister and her boyfriend who watched it with me and have heard the jokes about a billion times, but I can't stop.

I probably watch too much stand up, but it's like my crack.

Today while I was attempting a crossword puzzle, Ben had mentioned something about King Tut (which was an answer to one of the numbers) and then started doing a dance and he referenced Steve Martin.

I didn't think that much about it but I asked my Dad about the dance and he youtubed Steve Martin's King Tut stand up routine and it was way funnier than I was expecting.

I don't give Steve Martin enough credit sometimes.

I've been taking walks around Battle Ground Lake lately.

I practically live out there during summer, but I forgot how nice it is to walk the trail and enjoy nature.

My dog Tito has been my loyal companion, but he pees a minimum of 6 times everytime we walk the trail.

It's not very classy, but he's the only one who I have to walk the trail with.

Hopefully when I find someone who wants to go on walks around the lake with me they won't pee as often as my pomeranian. At least not publicly.

It's around 2:30 am now, and I think I am going to stop writing.

This blog was not as well thought out or witty as I would have liked, but I'm too tired to add flare.

Oh, before I leave...I lost six pounds this week! 

I was pretty damn excited. I joined weight watchers and love it. Plus the group leader is hilarious.

I'm currently in week two and I'm doing really well except I can't seem to drink enough water, which is weird because noramlly I chug that stuff like it's going out of style.

I think I hear an owl outside. I want to open my window before I go to sleep, but I'm scared of owls.

I think I will be brave and go open it, though.

The breeze I get at night and the way my room feels in the morning makes it worth it.

But I swear the owl is getting closer...it's like it knows I'm going to be vulnerable without a glass pane between us.

Gender Indentification Problem

Have you ever thought someone was either a male or female,

and then found out they were the other, and then you didn't quite think they were as cool.

That just happened. I was watching a youtube video.

That's probably creepy 

Longer blogs will proceed.

Awesome Random Fact

I don't know why I've felt the need to report this...but it is such a cool fact.

The most expensive substance in the World is Antimatter, which sells for a whopping

$1.75 Quadrillion an OUNCE.

Can you say whoa?

I have a dare for you all.

All, as in probably just Izzie, since I don't know of anyone else who reads this blog.

But...

I have a challenge.

Be vulnerable.

With my border-line agoraphobia tendencies lately, I strongly suggest you try.

Open up in a creative way, be it pictures, music, or my personal favorite...writing.

Trust me, when you get out exactly what you need to say at that moment, and let out every emotion you are feeling in some way, you'll feel better.

But better yet...share it with someone.

I blog to get stuff out. As nerdy as that may be, it's 100% true.

And sure, there are times when I can't bring myself to write about how I'm feeling because I honestly cannot bring myself to face it because that means it's real.

But when I do do write about hard things, I always force myself not to regret it.

Since,

1. I'm getting it off my chest and

2. I can always look back and remember how that moment felt, and how good it feels not to be there.

Plus, if there's a chance I can help someone else by sharing my trials and tribulations, then it's a win-win.

So, 

Next time you feel like you are about to burst, grab a pen and paper.

Write a letter to someone and tell them exactly how you feel. Then...MAIL IT.

Or, grab your camera and snap as many pictures as you can.

Just do something to get built up emotions out of you.

It's terrifying, I know. But just do it.

I promise you'll feel better.

Oh, and the other thing I've been hearing a lot about today is smiling just to make yourself feel better. It's worth a shot.

Fake it 'till you make it. 

I really really feel

Lifeless.

And I feel like I will never start having a life.

Hopelessness is the worst feeling.

Ever.

Manzanita or Bust...

My Family has decided to register for our very first 5K!

I am not a runner....at all. But I would like am going to become one.

So, starting this week we are all starting a training program so July 25th we can run a 5k in Manzanita Beach, Oregon. 

It will be 3.1 miles of running on one of the many beautiful beaches of the Oregon Coast.

Also, I picked this beach location because it's a few hours away, and my family can have a fun mini-vacation.

5K here I come.

Gotta Give My Props to The Joe Bros....

Ask The Wizard.

1 Thing Regarding 10 Things

They are remaking "10 Things I Hate About You."

I am pretty stoked.

Maybe I'm just craving some good ol' fashioned typical high school mumbo jumbo.

I've got tissues stuffed in my nose, and I can't stop sneezing.

I got cold'd.

Oh, and p.s. I think I want to start writing a book.

That's quite a commitment, especially since my knack for spelling is on the fritz, but it is sure worth a try.

A Bit Belated

"Belated" is the word of the day. Or week. Or 2009, I suppose.

But it's not bad.

First of all, a much belated THANK YOU to Iz for my splendid picture that she made me.

It's on my wall, and I am looking into framing it.

I love it more than any art I've ever received. So again, thank you very much.

This blog is belated as well.

Lately I've been feeling so much.

Feeling everything. And I have been lacking the skill to transfer those feelings to words. 

But I figured I'd give writing another shot.

Since I miss missing writing. Lately I don't miss it. I guess I missed it enough to write tonight, though.

Raise your hand if you're sick of all forms of the word "miss."

My homework is late. More like not done. 

I'm trying to think of more things that would fall under the belated catagory. 

Oh, I know. I finally finished New Moon today.

Epilogue and all. 

It was good. 

But...

(spoiler alert)

I had to stop reading it because I was so sick of hearing Bella's rants about missing Edward.

Yes, if I was dating Edward Cullen I would not forget about him overnight. 

But when probably 400 pages of a 5oo-something page book consist of nothing more than whining about missing Edward, it can make even the most devoted fans consider throwing 

that book into the wood chipper.

Nothing personal, Stephanie Meyer.

I like love. I do not like girls who cannot get over 1 guy, vampire or not.

I am now reading the third book and enjoying it. Hopefully no more pity love mush, or it's into the chipper.

Has anyone ever noticed that Dwight Schrute and Ben Folds look quite a bit alike?

See for yourself:

I love them both.

One for his life-changing music, and the other for his bear facts.

The Superbowl was really really fan-freaking-tastic this year.

Best ever, I'd say.

Arizona didn't win, but they also didn't let me down.

Fitzgerald was stupendous. My whole house was screaming watching him run.

And the commercials were hilarious.

I feel satisfied with this blog entry.

It feels so good to let it out using words.

Sometimes everything just feels perfect. 

No matter what tomorrow brings.

Damn You Twitter

You are so cool.

I'm NOT in a good mood.

Which is exactly why I should blog.

Not only does it provide a venting station, but when I have a good day, I can appreciate it.

I guess I'm mad because I've had a crazy stomach ache for 24 hours. Be it the bird flu or just something I ate, I'm not happy about it.

Also, I had a spanish test today. Not only does spanish suck, but I failed the test I'm almost positive.

And I spent almost 3 hours studying today. So, obviously that was a waste.

Not to mention I didn't do my hair or makeup today. Liberating it is not.

Waking up late (for the 3rd time in a row) can really start a day off on the wrong foot.

I cannot get to bed before midnight. The earliest I've been to bed in the last 3 weeks is 11 PM.

It's now 12:33. I still have to shower, blow dry, and straighten my hair.

Awesome.

People's small comments all day have been getting to me. These comments are the core of my bad day.

I just really want people to know that I am awesome at remembering remarks.

Another load that's been heavy on my mind is that I'm just not happy right now.

I'm not depressed. I never have been. 

I'm just not super excited about life right now. I'm excited about things that will happen in the furture, like turning 18 and moving and stuff like that.

But at the same time I feel like my childhood/teenage years are promptly slipping away from me. 

I don't know what bothers me more, the fact that time is going by too fast when it comes to being a kid, or the fact that I don't care enough to try and do something about it.

I really feel like life is just at a stand-still for me. But it's just me who's standing still.

I'm more of hermit than ever. 

And sure, I'm trying to make plans, but I get this weird anixety that I can't even describe when I do.

It's just not good. 

But the more I think about it, I could use more friends. 

Since I tend to get mad at my friends for their choices they make.

But I love them all, I just don't think I'm a very good friend to them.

To sum up my day...

I kept looking at random places when I was walking like a staircase, or the grass, and all I could think was, "If I just layed down there and sort of melted into it for a few months, that'd be fine."

And I don't think that's how I should be feeling.

Maybe it's the weather.

Maybe it's my lack of social interaction from the last 6 months.

Maybe it's the fact that I'm 16 and quitting school and traveling the World isn't an option right now.

All I know is I want to cry really hard tonight.

I want every bad feeling to just pour out with the tears.

I don't even want a hug.

That's how lonely I'm feeling.

La buona notte sono triste

Should-A, Could-A, Would-A

I need to stop expecting things to happen to me that are exciting.

I need to go out and find life-changing moments.

I need to stop having them pass me by.

I need to live by the quote, "Life isn't about finding yourself, it's about creating yourself."

I need to change. Alot.

I need to make 2009 a year I will never forget.

I need to do that.

It's a Brand-Spankin'-New Year

Which deserves some blogging.

I have about 15 resolutions, but only half of them I can actually remember.

But the ones that I have decided to stick to are as follows:

-Actually USE my gym membership 

-Write Everyday. And I mean everyday. Whether it be a blog, a journal, or even a letter. It all counts.

-Read more than I do know. I love to read, but I never set time aside for it. Although I always manage to have time to watch Scrubs re-runs and knit a scarf...

-Take 1 picture everyday of 2009. A year in pictures? Awesome.

And last but certainly not least...

-Say "Yes" more.

No, I'm not a Yes Man movie knock-off, I just need to stop turning down my friends to hang out, or not doing stuff when I know I should be.

This is, however, not a slutty say yes more thing. Because I can see how this could be used to my disadvantage...

Just clearing that up.

I would also like to learn and use new word everyday, but let's face it, I suck at that.

I've been trying to fit "naulachaunt" or whatever the hell that word is that means causual into my vocabulary for months, and I still can't say it or spell it.

Maybe next year.

TOMORROW IS MY BEST FRIEND'S 18 BIRTHDAY!

Too bad I can't hug her since she's thousands of miles away.

I wonder how creepy I sound saying my best friend lives thousands of miles away.

Brooke isn't a mail-order best friend...

We became friends in Washington, then she up and moved to Indiana. Becauase she heard they have really good cable reception there, and Brooke loves her talk shows.

Okay...it was for her mom's job.

But we are best friends.

And she is becoming legal tomorrow!

Whoever said this...

"you need more blogs.

-anonymous"

Thank you.

Little comments like that make my day, and I really mean that.

Unless, of course, you are a 45 year old hairy man who reads girls' blogs for kicks, and then STOP READING NOW.

But if you aren't, then thanks. Really.

Son of a bitch.

Brooke just called. It was her who left that comment.

Ugh.

I don't care that tomorrow is her birthday now.

Really.

But the girl's got good timing, I gotta hand it to her.

Julia Nunes Julia Nunes Julia Nunes

You're going to love her.

I guarantee it.

Her cover songs are the best.

And any person that is good enough to open for 4 of Ben Fold's shows is plenty good enough for me.

I like building people up on pedestals.

I don't really enjoy doing it, but I just seem to do it a lot.

There is always that one person (most of the time it's a boy) who I just feel is perfect.

Every single thing about him. And I just make a mental note that me and said perfect man would never work out together because he's just too flawless for me.

And I have got to say there is no greater feeling than knocking that pedestal right out from underneath them.

Just knowing that they aren't perfect, and that chances are we probably wouldn't work out together because they aren't as ideal as I made them up to be is surprisingly comforting.

This is probably something that makes a lot more sense in my head.

It's time to make Sara an omelet.

And I'm going to make one for me too, but I'm not sure how to spell omelet as a plural.